Primary Emotions that Drive programs

While various groups program in different ways, there are some universal principles regarding programming that most groups do utilize. This includes the use of emotions to drive programs, with the emotions held by very young parts.

These emotions can be categorized into both negative and positive emotions, and can include:

  • Guilt: this is developed within very young parts (fetal parts, for international groups) for a reason: if the person feels tremendous guilt, then they will believe that they “deserve” the abuse, or programming, and will be less likely to fight it. This guilt can be created in various ways, such as:
    • Hurting the birth mother, and having the birth mother blame the fetus (in fetal programming, the birth mother is the first “programmer” since the fetus will attune to her voice and emotional state)
    • Infant traumas that cause guilt, such as blaming the infant for the death of the birth mother; or for “killing” another baby, etc.

Because the infant will believe they have done “bad” things, they will begin to believe the script that they “deserve” to be punished, or that they are “evil”. This is the basis for self-punishment and reprogramming sequences (the reprogramming systems will often have a foundational belief that they are “keeping the evil” within at bay, or other reasons, for continuing to do their internal jobs).

  • Rage: Rage is used to drive self-punishment programs; self-sabotage; assassin programs, and others. The child is taught to “give away” the rage to these parts, who hold the rage and then deliver it to fuel the programs.
  • Terror: This emotion, which is often held by a direct core split (as the other emotions described here are, too), will include a primal terror of disobedience to either the trainers, or to a spiritual being (such as Satan). In the prenatal traumas, the fetus will be put through setups in which at first the birth mother, and eventually at some point, the fetus, is given a command which they disobey.  Once the disobedience occurs, the punishment is swift and brutal, and could include the birth mother and fetus being put to death temporarily, and then resuscitated if they vow to “never disobey”; or the fetus being taken out of the womb, exposed to bright lights, cold, and painful shocks or other traumas, and being told that they cannot go back into the womb unless they vow to never disobey; the fetus is told that the trauma outside the womb is “the terror of disobedience” in this cruel setup. Similar setups may occur during infancy or early childhood, depending upon the age the group creates the trauma, such as lowering the child into a deep well; hanging them from a bridge; or lowering them partway into a rat pit, or burying them alive,  to name a few examples.  

In order for the core to dismantle this fear of disobedience, the core and other parts will need to be able to process these early traumas that instilled this feeling of terror. This terror will often fuel retaliation programs if other parts attempt to stop running their programs (the retaliation parts will have a deep terror of the programs stopping, but may not consciously remember why, at first). These prime terrors regarding “disobedience” instilled will often create the conflicts about giving up programs seen in many survivors: while parts want the programs to stop, other parts may be terrified of what could happen if they do; or of facing these early traumas.

  • Despair: very early in life, including in the womb for groups that do prenatal programming, an initial core split that holds intense despair will be created. This split may hold despair due to:
    • Rejection by the birth mother, or another prime mother figure (e.g. being told they want the fetus to die; they want to abort the fetus, etc.)
    • Belief instilled that things will “never get better” and therefore attempting to fight the trainers is useless. This despair is carefully contained within these parts, whose job is in part to demotivate the individual from attempting to dismantle their programs, or to leave the group

When a survivor encounters core despair, it can feel overwhelming. This feeling often fuels internal suicide and omega programs, as well as “don’t bother to try healing, it will never work” programs. This is why having healthy support, and working on processing the feelings at a safe pace, are important.  It is important to balance internal work of this type with experiences that create healthier emotions and satisfaction.

  • Love: this emotion is manipulated, through the use of attachment needs in the fetus and/or infant. Often, trainers will tell the very young child “we are doing this because we love you” and other scripts designed to exact control. The fetus will be told “I love you” by the birth mother in order to enhance the bond, and increase control over the fetus (who will agree to the earliest programming in order to please the birth mother and win her love). There will often be “good babies” (who obey the birth mother and trainers) set in direct opposition to “bad babies” (who are rejected, and “deserve punishment” in these early scripts).  As the child grows, their need for love will be manipulated over and over again, to drive programs such as loyalty programs, recontact programs, and rescue programs (where the individual will attempt to “rescue” loved ones in the group who are threatened, by coming back, if they attempt to leave).

Love for God is also manipulated. The primary trainer will often play the part of “god” in the system, and will show either “love” or “anger” in order to get the infant to respond in the desired way. This includes periods of intentional bonding, during which the infant is held, nurtured, rocked, and played with, to promote loyalty to the trainer and a desire to please him or her.

  • Joy: The emotion of joy may be manipulated as well, as the “reward” side of the programs. When an individual is obeying their programming, they may be flooded with joy and a sense of well-being from these parts, which may include “celestial” or “ascended” parts that have experienced setups in the “celestial realms” in which good experiences occurred. Most punishment systems (such as “hell” systems, etc.) will be counterbalanced with reward systems that show (and feel) the “joys” of obedience. The reward systems will often be discovered much later than the punishment systems, for a reason: the systems often do not want to give up the “good” feelings held by reward systems; but want to be set free from the uncomfortable ones.
  • Peace: In a childhood filled with abuse, control and violence, the moments of peace and a sense of well-being are treasured. These feelings are often created through intentional setups that may include drugs and/or technology, as a reward to the systems for obedience. Loss of this peace is seen as a form of punishment, and is a motivator to continue running programs.

In the false Christian systems, “peace” such as this may also be used to manipulate the individual. If they are praying about a decision, the false Christian parts may cause a feeling of peace if the individual makes a decision that agrees with the cult agenda; and a sense of unease if they are disobeying it. It can take time to work through this type of program, and discern what is truly the Holy Spirit, versus what is programmed in.

These are some of the primary emotions used to drive programming in an individual. Often, parts will share first about how the programs are set up inside; it is often later in the healing journey when the emotions at the base of the programs that actually drive them, come forward. It is as important to process the feelings held by these parts, as to gain the cognitive memories, in order for full healing to occur. This is where providing a safe environment for emotional processing is critical to healing from intentional trauma.

Spiritual Controllers

Note: this is based upon a short book I wrote a few years ago.

Master controllers for a Jesuit spiritual system will reflect the primary spiritual relationships in the child’s life.  Here, several are discussed.

Althea (the Tree of Life)

These will include the “unholy trinity” of the Father (Satan), the Son (the antichrist and the beast) and the Spirit (Althea, the tree of life).  The Fathers worship all three. In fact, the Arbor de Vitae monastery just north of Rome (the primary Jesuit monastery) is believed to be the dwelling place of Althea, the tree of life. This wicked creature lives in the basement of the monastery, and the young children (and adults) will often hear her moaning at night to be fed. And they do feed her, at regular intervals, with sacrifices of every human variety.

The Jesuit children are taught from infancy to participate in these rituals; as infants, the Fathers place their hands over a baby’s, and teach them to make the sacrifice. As the child gets older, they must take a more active role, or suffer severe punishment by Althea (which appears at times like a huge willow whose branches “whip” the child terribly).

No child ever wants to be called down for a spiritual whipping of this manner, and so they quickly learn how to feed the tree very efficiently. After a ritual, the tree will be quiet for days or weeks, but will always begin moaning again to be fed. The child grows up knowing that in order for there to be peace, they must give this entity what it asks for. The child will have been dedicated to Althea, will have a representation of her in their system, and must dismantle it, kick out the spiritual entity, and heal the human part.

Helping the Survivor

When the tree of life is pulled out (only after trauma processing, support, and the system is ready to do so!) the three roots (white, black and silver gray) must also be rooted out, since these represent early infant demonic traumas used in installing the roots of the tree of life and the q’ballah internally. This takes extensive prayer, seeking the Lord, and asking the Holy Spirit to help the survivor overcome the fear of uprooting these demonic strongholds.

The tree of life will often have grown to a large tree with 1,000 points of life, each representing a life taken (including those of infants), and the demonic that entered as a result, during the installation of the tree. These lives must be grieved for; the murders repented of, and forgiveness received, to break the hold of the tree of life on the survivor’s mind.

Some survivors will also have a mirror images of the tree of life, or a “tree of death” internally, that again is based upon the ritual murder of young infants, with the roots attached to the heart of the survivor (they are wrapped around the heart, and the survivor may believe that they will die if the tree is taken out).

The survivor will need to realize that the Lord is able to undo even this type of programming; can overcome the fear of uprooting the demonic. It can help the survivor if they are reminded that the fear they feel is the fear that the demonic feels at losing its “home” inside, and that they will actually feel more peace once the tree is rooted out. They can pray and ask the Lord to uproot it for them; this may be seen visually inside as Jesus reaching in and pulling it out, or as an increased peace as the rituals are repented of, and the person exercises authority.

The relief may be dramatic, or occur over several weeks. But the survivor will have more internal peace and healing once they choose to get rid of this voracious entity, and allow the Holy Spirit to fill them instead.

The Beast

The Beast has a room and a lair in the Vatican dedicated to him. This room supposedly dates from early Roman times, when sacrifices were conducted in the original cave located there that the Vatican was built over. This angry and vindictive spirit makes its presence known, and is eagerly sought out by the Fathers, since they believe he gives great power over enemies. The young child will be placed during the second year of life in a dark, cave-like lair underneath the altar in the Beast’s room. They will spend 24 hours in this lair, where the Beast visits with the child, makes suggestions, and eventually has the child give in to its requests (to kill another child put in with them).

This is extremely traumatizing to the young child, who feels intense guilt. The child will have internalized the Beast (see the above discussion on programming methods used). This internal Beast only knows and understands killing and destroying, and spiritual warfare and deliverance must be done to free the human part trapped by the spiritual part. The Beast also gives energy to the punishment systems described previously, and will demand absolute obedience to it and the Pantheon, until the individual learns their authority in Yeshua, and is able to break free.

Satan

Many times, it can take years of dedicated work to go beneath the tree and beast layers, and reach the true system controller: Satan.  From pre-birth and birth dedication, this is the being the Jesuits truly serve, in both his incarnations: as satan (cruel, vicious, demanding, destructive and lying) and Theo (kind, benevolent, manipulative, charming). The child will have been bonded to both, as described previously.

Satan’s Throne

During the toddler years, at times the child will be physically placed on satan’s throne. When supplicants crawl up the hall on ground glass, or nails, or hot rocks, satan will be sitting on the throne next to the child. He will ask the child what kind of judgment should be made; or what price should be paid for a request, and the child will answer. If satan is pleased with the answer, he and the child will simultaneously make the pronouncement. If the child is too kind-hearted, they will be punished severely until they learn the types of judgment that are acceptable.

This internalizes the satan identity for the core master controller, since the adults treat the child on satan’s throne as if he/she were satan himself, in every way. The child is actually temporarily possessed, in that part, by satan during the ceremonies and judgments. The evil behavior convinces the survivor that he/she is evil and anchors the belief in the part that they are actually satan.

Helping the survivor

 In later years, the adult will have to overcome very difficult memories of the lives taken or asked for when in that role, and the cruel decisions made. They will need to repent of these deeds, and ask the Lord for forgiveness (which He offers freely). It can help to remind the survivor that the Lord knew all about their past, even when they didn’t; that He is not surprised or repulsed by them or their past. When they came to Jesus, He knew all about each act they committed, and forgave them.

They will also need emotional support to process the pain of these memories, and to be treated as loveable, in spite of the horrific acts that they committed. This is a challenge, since many Christians want to “turn away” from those with a past such as this. But the survivor is looking to their therapist or support person to demonstrate the love of Christ to systems that may have no idea of what true Christianity is.

Once they “get it” and realize they are forgiven, these parts will quickly give up their old jobs and choose freedom, if they believe they have the physical safety to support healing.

AddressingCommon Challenges to Healing Work

By Jo Getzinger

Note: the following material is from the upcoming New Training Manual for those who Help Survivors from CARE; used with permission

1. Demonic Control

Survivors of ritual abuse not only need to greatly increase their joy capacity in order to consciously handle their horrific stories held in the unconscious mind; they also often experience demonic control over the emotions, information and parts that contain those memories.  During ritual events, survivors are frequently forced to accept demonic spirits over parts.  Demonic spirits then dictate to those parts the amount of disclosure, if any, intensify traumatic emotions and they can flood memories and traumatic emotions if memories do begin to emerge in order to overwhelm the survivor.  Parts who have cooperated with agreements to commit sin in rituals (these parts are often coerced through threats or punishment and torture) are vulnerable to continued demonic control and punishment due to un-repented sin.  The sin gives ground to the demonic to continue to control these parts. 

Furthermore, parts are often reluctant to accept Jesus and His forgiveness because of the programming to believe He would never accept them; they could never be forgiven for the evil they participated in; and/or through cult trickery the parts are convinced that Jesus is duplicitous, evil, condemning and untrustworthy (parts have been introduced to false Jesus actors who are actually cult members dressed up like the historical Jesus and then participate in evil). Clarity regarding who Jesus really is is important for healing this wound.

Important truths for addressing demonic hindrance to memory work

– God is willing and able to forgive all sin committed by the survivor

– Vows, covenants and agreements made with the demonic, whether under duress or ‘freely given’, are NOT permanently binding and can be broken (the demonic do not truly keep their sides of the agreements anyway). They are also sin and should be repented of, renounced and revoked.

– These spirits are easily removed by the true Jesus as the survivor repents and gives Him permission to do so

2. Vows and Agreements

In cult rituals, survivors are often ordered to take vows and agreements against their healing.  Common agreements in the form of vows are “not to remember” the ritual or traumatic event.  This vow will commonly manifest in the presenter system or host system as saying, “I don’t know” to any question asked that pertains to the traumatic event.  The host is unconsciously repeating the very vow they originally agreed to take.  This becomes a continued agreement with the demonic to keep the information buried in the unconscious.  When the host utters the words “I don’t know”, she agrees to forget again and nothing is remembered.  Through the perceived experience of the host, these words anchor to nothing and she really feels like she does not know.  It is common to find parts in the system with the name and role “I don’t know”.  These are blockers to remembering and healing.  Until the host and presenter systems are ready to challenge vows like “I don’t know” and repent of agreements made with the demonic, memory work will likely be impeded. 

3. Internal Conflicts

In internal conflicts regarding memory work, there are parts who want the memory work to happen, and parts who do not. These conflicts are often invoked by concerns about the ‘cost’ or ‘consequences’ of the memory work: beliefs that memory work would lead to insanity, chaos, destruction or jailtime; beliefs that memory work would cause loved ones to be hurt by the cult; beliefs that God can’t really help with memory work so bad things will still happen, and so on.

Parts who are reluctant to trust the true Jesus have likely been taught to trust only themselves and their own self-strength and self-sufficiency and to do the cult’s bidding because it appear to be the path of least resistance.  These parts were subjected to dealing with the demonic and cult member’s torture, rewards and punishment system from the time they were young. This causes them to readily make deals with the demonic and cult members in order to survive and save love ones.  These loved ones (those who the parts are purposefully bonded to in the cult group) are also threatened by the cult and used by the cult to blackmail the survivor into vows and agreements against one’s own healing and doing evil deeds for the cult to buy time for self and others to survive.  They often believe they have no choice but to continue to cooperate by attending rituals in order to minimize punishment from demonic torture and increase rewards (perceived saving self and others from punishment while receiving other fleshly perks). 

The rituals always require a price to pay to demonstrate obedience and loyalty to the demonic and cult members.  While saving self and those they love from punishment, they are forced to participate in harm to those the cult has chosen as victims.  Frequently, those they love are also victimized but not as badly they are told as these loved ones would be treated if the parts decide to become disobedient to the cult.  The evil deeds the parts are forced to do to show their loyalty and accept vows “not to remember” in order to buy survival for themselves and loved ones becomes a demonically enforced amnesic barrier to the traumatic event.  This is coupled with the fear that the cult and the demonic will carry through with their threats that worse will happen to self or loved ones if the disobedience continues and more is remembered and reported to outsiders.  It is common for survivors to report seeing internal walls that keep the survivor from seeing what is behind the wall.  This can be a self-constructed wall patterned after a real wall where the original trauma took place.   This serves to remind the host that she cannot go past the wall or she will remember what she does not want to see.  There is often forced sacrificing in front of this wall to make a covenant not to remember anything beyond the wall or anything done in front of that wall to seal the memory in unconsciousness.

The internal conflict is the desire to remember and heal while also not wanting to remember because it is too awful to remember and something worse will happen if it is remembered.  Hopefully, the above example of this common internal conflict clarifies why these conflicts need time and work between the survivor and helper together.  THIS WORK CANNOT BE RUSHED.  If the helper gets pushy or impatient with these parts who feel as if theirs and their loved ones’ very survival is riding on discovering the truthful and correct answers to their dilemma, they will withdraw and continue to strike bargains with the demonic and cult members. 

The conflicted part’s questions must be answered to their satisfaction about the historical true and living Savior, Jesus.  There must be time given to them to test the truth of His Word by attempting to give Him some control to see if He is consistent and powerful enough to protect parts from demonic retaliation.  They must have time to begin a relationship with the true Jesus to experience His great love for them.  I have never seen the LORD introduce Himself to parts in an impatient, pushy way.  He is willing to wait patiently and will gently be a helper to them when they are ready to ask.  He is always “an ever present help in times of trouble” Psa. 46:1.  When parts are satisfied that they have their questions answered, the deceptive beliefs that were infused by the cult conquered, and the character of the true Jesus firmly understood and experienced, they will be ready to ask Him to forgive vows they made and evil deeds done.  They will be able to trust Him to protect themselves and loved ones from demonic and cult retaliation instead of continuing to bargain with terrorists for their lives. 

They will need to see from you, the helper, the modeling of LORD’s true character (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, thoughtfulness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self control).  Once they see that there are real Christians who do their best to live out the gospel, the host can learn to model the same to parts. They will be drawn to the LORD’s character and love because you and the host have been consistently demonstrating the loving-kindness of the LORD to them.  They will be more open to believing the LORD is different from the example they saw in the cult because of the example of your life and they will be open to experiencing His love directly from Him.  You and the host are often His bridge to these wounded and deceived parts who carry some of the greatest conflicts and obstacles to healing.  We will discuss more on various common internal conflicts in a later chapter.

Healing is a process

Was I Illuminati or Jesuit? Healing is a Process

Since I started my blog, I have received several emails asking why there appear to be several differences between the personal history related in my newer articles, and the ones I wrote several years ago (available at this site). This post will explain why.

Healing dissociation is a process. Often, memories come in ‘layers’ or ‘stages’, filling in previously missing gaps in the story, or shedding new light on an old story. In a way, it is like the process of completing a jigsaw puzzle: small portions of the puzzle are filled in initially, but the ability to view the “whole picture” only occurs as more pieces come together. It is a natural part of the process of healing from dissociation and mind control, to progressively learn more about one’s history and self, as one’s faith grows and different parts (including the host) increasingly experiences the blessings of internal cooperation and healing. In this post, I will describe two major ‘stages’ of discovering my life history: knowing that I was working for the Illuminati, and knowing that I was in the Jesuit order.

One of the most outstanding differences between my first set of svali posts (written roughly twenty years ago) and my posts from the last two years is this: I had written back then that I was a member of the Illuminati; in many of my more recent posts (2017-2019), I write that I was a member of the Jesuit order, and have described in no less detail various aspects of a childhood and adulthood in the order.

Both sets of posts describe my life history. They are not mutually exclusive experiences. I worked in the Illuminati in the US, and was also a part of the Jesuit order. When I first began my healing, my first layer of cult-related memories was of being an Illuminati programmer in the United States. I was in my American system of parts, and was mainly learning about the traumas and cult activities that I had been involved in within the US.  The process of addressing the dissociation and healing from the memories that were coming was very difficult. Having to decide what to do and how to move forward with God as I realized that I was not just ‘making it all up’ was very difficult. As difficult as it already was, I assumed (wrongly) without exploring further that the Illuminati memories already represented all of my cult-related life history. My posts from twenty years ago reflect this perspective.

While I did not realize at that point that significant portions of my personal history were still dissociated, I was aware that I had not fully healed yet. I had several responsibilities during that time (including raising my children after I received custody and working 2-3 jobs to make ends meet). During this time, I stopped writing my svali posts online for a period of time. Finally, in 2006, I  had the opportunity to spend two years fulltime on healing (I went completely offline at this time).

During this two years, I journaled intensely, often up to 8 hours a day. This was when more of my life history came forward, as parts deeper within began to share. I discovered that the work for the Illuminati in America was only part of my life, and I actually was part of the Jesuit order. I learned that I had not only been a programmer for the Illuminati, but had been one for the Jesuit order. I also discovered the cult had constructed identities and life histories, ‘presentations’, for other parts of me in other nations, with other names and families. I learned that my very name, family and life in America was also a ‘constructed identity’ by the cult and that I had been assigned to work with the Illuminati in the US for the Jesuits since I was a child. My American mother was one of my main trainers in America, I first met her as a very young child at the Jesuit training facility in Rome (She was not my only trainer, I had several others).  She, along with Dr. Timothy Brogan and others, had helped program my American system of parts to only remember life in America and to completely believe that she, my stepfather and my sister were my only family.

This new set of memories overseas was no less heartbreaking and shocking for me to uncover. Again, my sense of who I was and my history as I had understood it, was shaken. On many days, it felt like I had to process my life story all over. A couple of supportive friends who were crucial to my healing during that time, and what I had learned during the earlier phase of healing about God’s faithfulness, comfort, ability to bring truth, dealing with denial and so on truly helped me through this extremely painful phases of my journey. The fact that before 2006 – 2008 I did not remember this portion of my history does not invalidate what I wrote in my earlier articles; I just didn’t have this part of the story yet when I wrote them. Healing is a process, and memories may be held by several layers of parts. It does not invalidate the memories of one part, if they are unaware of the history of the others. The fuller picture unfolds as the person progresses in healing.

It has not been easy learning why I had not remembered my Jesuit memories earlier in my healing journey: I had deep attachments with the fathers who had raised (and programmed) me. While much of what I had with the fathers were in fact ‘trauma-bonds’ (they had traumatized then rescued me to create dependence), there was also love and affection – they had been my world, and I lived to please them since early childhood. As a very young child, I had promised them that I would never betray them. ‘Not betraying’ and remaining loyal to them meant that I could never remember the Order if I tried to heal, and that I would never address my deeper programming and break the mind control that they had installed. It had been ‘easier’ for me to address my Illuminati memories as I did not have the same depth of investment in protecting them or being loyal to them as I did the Jesuits. As a child and adult serving the Jesuits, my life in the Illuminati in the US was one of my ‘jobs’/‘assignments’, but the Jesuits were who I then felt were my ‘real’ family and home.

I started to know and process these memories as God helped me to realize to a deeper level that healing and rejecting the group’s programming to not remember was not a betrayal (that was a deception introduced when I was very young in order to control me), and that it did not mean that I did not care. Wanting my mind to be free did not mean that I was hurting the fathers. I started to learn more about my Jesuit history after growth in several areas of my life: knowing that God cared about people in the Order and wanted them to know the truth too; knowing that God loved me enough to hold me through the grief and anguish that would come as discovered my Jesuit memories; knowing that God could protect my heart, mind and body as I addressed the deeper programming and parts related to this aspect of my life history; knowing that God could help me to know truth and cut through all the confusion and pain. Basically, increased faith and understanding of God’s love and power enabled me to start remembering and processing my Jesuit memories; earlier in the journey, I did not have the capacity to do so. This stage of my healing came too as my system of parts grew utterly tired of being mind controlled to keep secrets, being only partially healed and vulnerable to the cult, and decided to ‘risk’ trusting God to heal.

My memories of having been programmed in a facility overseas, and being part of the Jesuit order with large parts of my life being in Vatican, have been consistent since 2007. I have been blessed with direct validation for some of my memories as well. I have also noted that my statistics for site visitors have often shown more visitors from Italy to my site, than any other country. There are several possible reasons for this: what I write may resonate with Italian survivors; there could be a deep desire to learn about dissociation and deprogramming within this country; or other reasons. I pray that my posts bless those who read them, including those in Italy.

I do hope that explaining the healing journey will be helpful in promoting understanding of the process a bit more.

Presenter Systems/Host Systems Programming

 Note: this describes some aspects of how presentation programming is done in some groups; this will vary greatly between organizations. It is  meant as an introduction to the topic, and is not  a complete description of all methods used, or all programs installed. 

The parts of an individual that often initially present in therapy or counseling have been variously labeled by therapists as the “presentation”, the “apparently normal part or ANP” or the “host”.  These are the parts that were created (with extensive help, if mind control is involved) to cover the fact that the individual has experienced traumatic, chronic abuse throughout childhood. In this book, we will call them “presenters” or “host system”.

An individual with mind control will be unable to do their assigned jobs well if it is obvious that they are traumatized, programmed and dissociated. This is one reason that a presenter or host system will be programmed in starting in the prenatal stage of life, and will be continuously reprogrammed throughout life: the presenters hide the reality of the individual’s real life history and skills not only from others, but from themselves.  They are considered a “cover”, under which the individual can look and act like one person, and act “normal”.  They are often considered the sheep that hide the “wolf” inside by groups that program them.

One myth is that the host, or presentation, has undergone less abuse than the other systems inside, and was split off to “protect” themselves from knowing how bad things were. This may be true for an individual who has not undergone mind control, in which case, the “core” and the “host” may be one and the same. But groups that use mind control will normally bury and hide the core behind layers of programming, and the parts that come out and live day to day life when outside of a cult facility may have undergone programming that is just as extensive, or even more so, than the assassins, warlocks and other parts that do not come out when interacting with non-cult members. The host or presentation in a mind controlled individual will often be one that has experienced some of the worst abuse within the system, and as a result, has made specific agreements to never disclose the abuse, and to perform in specific ways.

One example of this is programming of the presentation to embrace false, or “white” Christianity, instead of true Christianity. To prevent the individual from accepting true Christianity, the presentations may be put through various setups in which a false “Jesus” abuses them; where false church services are done, and the people in the setup all abuse the child while using typical Christian phrases such as “praise the Lord!” “Let me pray for you”, etc.  In other setups, the false “Jesus” is very loving and kind, embraces the child, comforts the child, and makes the child promise to always follow him, and to never allow the “other” (the real) Jesus near. Because the child bonds to the false “loving” Jesus, they agree. Because this Jesus is loving and kind, the individual may believe that he is the “real” one, until work on the anti-christian and false Christian programming in the host system is done. This false Jesus is much harder to detect than the angry, punishing one, and the individual will need to pray for the true God to show the difference. The end result is a presentation entering counseling that looks and sounds Christian, but with belief in a God and Jesus who are either powerless to save and heal, or who oppose true Christianity.

The host/presentation system entering into therapy with a background of mind control will often have extensive programming to have doubt, unbelief and denial raise up if the individual begins to recover memories of their abuse or rewards by the group that programmed them. If a memory comes forward, the person may have parts programmed to doubt their validity, and to doubt whether they can ever heal, or that God can ever heal them. In another layer, denial may come forward, causing the survivor to say that  the memories aren’t true, they are unbelievable, they must be made up, etc. The survivor will also deny God’s goodness, and will recover first memories that seem to confirm that God never showed up during their abuse; they will be programmed to deny and disbelieve the times that He did answer prayer.

There will often be parts in the presentation, connected to parts in every system, that also carry unbelief: even in the face of a miraculous answer to prayer, they will persist in having difficulty in believing that God answered them, or that He loves them. These parts have made prior agreements to always doubt, deny, or disbelieve the goodness and love of God, and the agreements and the traumas that caused the agreements to be made will need to be addressed.

The host system/ presentation is often one of the most cult loyal systems, due to its extensive programming. In order to do missions successfully, these parts must be able to switch in and out as needed to provide a cover. The amnesia to cult activity that survivors often report is due to an agreement by both the presenters and the parts that actively participate in rituals (which also include the presenters) to never remember and/or disclose this activity, not only to others, but to themselves. If a memory of participating in a ritual begins to come forward, the presentation will be programmed to deny what they are remembering, to disbelieve it, and to cast doubt on it. They may be flooded with “overwhelm”, crying and saying “I can’t stand to know this”, “this could never have happened to me”, “I will lose my faith if I believe this happened” and other reactions that prevent processing and healing of the traumas.

Accessing by a group using mind control will not occur in most cases without agreements by parts that this will occur. While survivors may report “abductions” and being dragged unwillingly to rituals, this is rarely the case in groups that use mind control. Instead, the presentation/Christian host has been programmed to agree to be accessed, and to believe that they can never prevent it or say “no” when a summons or signal (such as a knock at the door) comes. The parts that have been traumatized into making these agreements will need to break the agreements, and process their traumas, and also come to realize that they really do have a choice. It can help them to realize that people really do say “no” to access, and it works; they can be safe.

The presentation/host will often have extensive programming designed to keep amnesia going, especially regarding any evidence of ongoing cult activity (this will be discussed in more detail later in the chapter).  These parts have been programmed to ensure that the amnesia between parts inside continues, and involve agreements to never remember both by the presentation parts, and the parts that hold the memories.

An important part of presentation programming involves the use of buffers. Buffers may be located within a specific brainwave state (frequently, this is epsilon). The purpose of buffers is to create a stoical, unfeeling numbness that helps to hide the extensive trauma and feeling states further in. Buffers are charged with preventing the feelings involved with trauma (including recent activity such as being reprogrammed the night before, or attending a ritual two days ago) from intruding into the conscious awareness of the presentation. They act as emotionless guards, and do their jobs literally on pain of death, of self or of loved ones. Buffers have undergone extensive trauma to reach this state of feeling nothing, described by some as “blankness” or a state of “nothingness”.

The presentations will often be seated within various brainwave states. These include:

  • alpha (color-coded red): this is a relaxed state, and often includes parts with sexual programming
  • beta (color-coded blue): this is a slightly more alert wave state, and is where military and assassin programming may be located
  • gamma (color-coded green): this is a high-energy wavestate, and may be where loyalty to cult programming and to the group is located.
  • epsilon (color-coded grey-white): this is often where pain programming and buffer systems (split from the parts that learned to hold pain) is located.
  • theta (color-coded black): This is a low-energy brainwave state, and psychic ability is often seated in this state
  • delta (color codes may vary, with silver blue common): this is the brainwave state that came first, and which the other parts of the presentation are split from. Delta system is the controller for the other presentation parts and brainwave states, and will often hold memory files (coded based upon security level, and access to them guarded by delta) as well as internal programming and punishment files for the presentations.

 

 

Processing Mind Control Trauma

The following post was taken from an early draft of Prayer Warrior 2, a book with information about issues related to mind control and programming, and prayers related to these issues. The information was posted with permission from the author.

One of the foundations of mind control is unresolved memories of traumatic events. During the programming sessions, in which traumas such as torture occur, false beliefs are introduced which exert a powerful influence over the survivor until the memories are processed. Survivors can resist programming even before the traumas are processed, but it usually gets a lot easier when the memories are processed. This is because of how traumatic memories are stored in a dissociative survivor: the traumatic experience remains in the sensory and emotional processing areas of the brain which gives a visceral, emotional ‘punch’ to whatever instructions or beliefs the survivor was indoctrinated with during the trauma. This unconscious emotional drive remains until the traumatic event is processed and moves through these areas of the brain through the hippocampus into the cerebral cortex and becomes stored as conscious recall memory.

Also, during trauma, the desynchrony between the more primal areas of the brain dedicated to risk assessment and survival and the higher components of the brain dedicated to moral and rational thought creates a state in which the person will do ‘anything’ to stop the pain or threat. Until the memory is processed as the person is able to realize in the present that the threat felt in the trauma state is over, the individual will struggle with the emotions and beliefs that were present during the event. Once the memory is brought into conscious awareness and processed, the moral and rational centers of the mind will enable the person to evaluate the traumatic event and make meaning of it according to his or her paradigms and values , i.e. the person then has the ability to reject the messages given during the traumatic event and find new ones.

For instance, while processing a memory, a survivor who was told that his/her (forced) participation in a ritual event meant that he/she was evil can reject the lie that he/she was evil and see instead that he/she never wanted to do it and his/her heart was never evil; he/she would have never participated if given a choice. Instead of disowning this part of him/herself, the survivor can receive this part and the truth that he/she was never evil, only coerced beyond endurance at the time.

Programmers will try to prevent such memory processing so they can continue to exploit the trauma to control the survivor. To do so, they may deliberately ‘distribute’ the memory of an event into different parts of a survivor.  Different parts may hold the different sections of the narrative, the emotions, the physical sensations, the sense of time, the sense of self, the thoughts, the actions taken, the instructions given, etc. Fully processing the memory will involve putting together all these different components of the memory, with the help and cooperation of the different parts involved in the memory.

In order to process the memory, the survivor will need skills (which can be learned). These include: knowing how to allow God to lead and help in the process, noticing that it is safe enough in the present to start processing memories, commitment to the process, knowing how to process emotions (these come up when processing memories!), knowing how to regulate and pace the memory process; communicating with parts, resolving conflicts, identifying and understanding ‘blocks’ to the memory work (e.g., denial in the host), containing partially processed memories so he/she can return to them at a later time, managing daily life, sleep, etc. .

Fully processing and healing the memories of traumatic events not only involves ‘putting the different parts of the memory back together’, but it also involves connecting with God, the one who truly cares, in the memory and event itself. God never abandons anyone, especially traumatized children, though the survivor may feel this way as the memory and emotional pain come forward. God is able to reveal Himself in the places the memory has been encoded in the brain, bringing His comfort into the present within the memory and intervening directly where the pain and hurt is stored. His perspective of the event will be the most and only truthful version of the event: the cult will use the trauma to ‘enforce’ all kinds of lies about the survivor, about God, about the cult, such as: “If God/your parents loved you, you won’t be going through this,” “You’re being punished because you are evil,” “The cult can read your mind so never ever even think about disobeying”, “Nobody loves you,” etc. God’s presence and perspective will remove the sting and impact of the trauma on the survivor’s mind and life, as parts connect with His truth about what happened to them, and what those events really meant about themselves.

The process of processing and healing memories can be slow, confusing at times, often difficult and painful but it does bring healing. It deepens the survivor’s awareness of his/her own value, of how he/she fought to retain her own humanity and how his/her heart survived, despite whatever actions he/she may have been coerced into. It deepens the survivor’s relationship with God as she/he understands more and more that He never left him/her and can redeem anything done to the individual, and anything he/she has has done. It opens the survivor up to life, peace, joy and new relationships, as the mind control over his/her choices break. It is a process that is completely worth the effort, and God is close to the survivor every step of the way.

 

 

The Real Agenda Behind the Occult

As I have healed, my parts inside have shared more and more of the “real picture” of what was going on during my life. Early on, I had recovered some memories which were part of the story, but by no means the whole story of my life.  This is due to the fact that healing is a process, and over time, as parts deeper within the system have shared information, I have learned more. Early in my healing, I had only learned about my six brainwave systems (alpha, beta, gamma, delta, epsilon, theta) (see my earlier article on this) and had not discovered the six systems that were previously unknown to me (omicron, mu, null, lambda, omega, and chi).  When I remembered these other six previously unknown systems, I remembered more about the cult’s agendas, as that information was held in these systems.

When I was younger, I believed that the goal of occult groups, including the one I was raised in, was to create a “better world” through the coming New World Order.  I truly believed, in my cult host, that I was serving mankind by preparing to help usher in the time of “he who is to come” (link) who after his birth was known as “he who as come” as well as by other names.

I worked hard to improve things, and dedicated to my life to what I believed would be the betterment of mankind. What I had not remembered at that time was the secret held by my core (Chi) system, which was wholly dedicated to Satan: that the group I was in, while publicly stating their desire to bring in new world order filled with joy and peace, was actually committed to the complete destruction of mankind.

The reason for this is simple: they serve Satan, and that is his agenda; he wants mankind destroyed because he hates all men, who created by God, who loves them. The chi system parts were programmed since they were in the womb to absolutely hate God and all men (mankind was labled as “mortals” who were a fallen, descended state) and to desire the destruction of all mortals so that the immortal, or ascended, could reign.

This, in a nutshell, was the theology I was taught while in the group. This knowledge was hidden from my conscous awareness until late in my own healing journey. it was terrible to remember that I participated in meetings with others who were planning and looking forward to the destruction of mortal mankind; or the programming and torture in the womb of my birth mother and I by actors who stated scripts such as “we are mortal men, and cannot help ourselves from hurting you” and other similar ones. Later, these fetal parts were “rescued” by Satan, who then whispered “one day, you will be able to take revenge for what men have done to you.”

Even most of my cult parts were completely unaware of this programmed, hidden (to myself) agenda. Many cult loyal parts thought we were working to create a better, kinder world and it caused deep distress to realize that the real agenda of the group I was raised in was quite different.

What comforts me is the realization that while those in occultic groups are planning these things, their agenda will fail. The Bible has already described what will happen: Satan will make his play for power, using men and hybrids who serve him, and he will not win. It won’t even be a contest, because the God of the Christian Bible is the creator, not the created; and will bring about the real new creation and reign on earth that mankind is looking towards.

The difference? The Christian God truly loves His creation, while Satan despises it. I am thankful that the One who loves me and all mankind, the true God, is the One who will win. Satan’s time is limited; he knows this, so he will attempt to draw men into his plans and schemes. My prayer is that those who have believed himi will become aware that Satan is a liar; and the Christian God tells the truth.